Published: September 03, 2009 11:41 pm      

‘All About’ a terrible movie

GREENVILLE — ALL ABOUT STEVE

What is a seven letter word for a dreadful movie? How about ‘STINKER?’

While crossword puzzlers may enjoy the wordplay and trivia in “All About Steve,” most viewers will be turned off by the constant torrent of arcane info as well as by the stalking scenario, not to mention the sheer silliness of it all.

Shod in her shiny red go-go boots, Mary Horowitz (Sandra Bullock) blithely traipses through life babbling about word derivations and and esoteric data gleaned from her years designing crossword puzzles.

When the lovelorn cruciverbalist (crossword puzzle constructor) meets handsome CCN cameraman Steve (Bradley Cooper) on a blind date, it’s love at first sight. Actually only Mary is smitten; Steve thinks that the puzzle lady is demented.

Undeterred by Steve’s brush-off, Mary decides to follow the photojournalist on his cross-country news assignments. Eventually, at the site of a cave-in, Mary becomes part of a news story. Wouldn’t you know it? Her knowledge of obscure facts saves the day.

Bullock, who also serves as producer, tries and fails to make her predatory character appealing. Cooper plays the baffled hunk.

Director Phil Traill and screenwriter Kim Barker deserve the blame for creating a not very funny, predictable and slightly creepy romantic comedy.

Among the supporting cast, Ken Jeong fares well, but Thomas Haden Church, Katy Mixon and DJ Qualls seem ridiculous as a jerk, a bimbo and an apple sculptor.

Rated PG-13 1 and 1/2 Stars

EXTRACT

Writer and director Mike Judge’s “Extract” savors all the comedic flavors in his hilarious new film about a company where vanilla, cherry, almond, walnut, root beer and other culinary extracts are manufactured.

After an accident at the plant which injures an employee named Step (Clifton Collins Jr.), Joel Reynold (Jason Bateman), the proprietor of Reynold Extracts, is threatened with a lawsuit that could cause his business to go into bankruptcy. KISS bass player and reality TV star Gene Simmons portrays frighteningly funny personal injury attorney Joe Adler.

As he faces the prospect of shuttering Reynold Extracts, Joel also finds himself embroiled in a complex domestic drama. His wife Susie (Kristen Wiig) seems to have fallen for dimwitted pool boy Brad (Dustin Milligan). At the same time, Joel lusts after sexy factory temp worker Cindy (Mila Kunis), who might not be as innocent as she seems.

Academy Award winner Ben Affleck plays Joel’s friend and confidant Dean, a long-haired barkeep at Scoreboards in the Marriot Hotel. Following Dean’s advice causes Joel to get into all kinds of trouble. When the bartender gives his friend “ecstasy,” the pill turns out to be a horse tranquilizer.

Other members of the quirky cast include J.K. Simmons as factory supervisor Brian, T.J. Miller as tattooed Rory, Beth Grant as disgruntled assembly line worker Mary and David Koechner as Joel’s obnoxious neighbor Nathan.

After “Office Space,” which premiered 19 years ago, Judge returns to the workplace with this witty, character-driven comedy. Sometimes raunchy and definitely R-rated, “Extract” measures up.

Rated R 3 Stars